Dharma Drops Podcast Ep 14: Vaginas, Art, + Creativity (Transcript)
Below is an automated transcription of Episode 17 “Vaginas, Art, + Creativity with Gaby Merediz” To listen to the full episode, use the player below or listen on all podcast apps. Like Dharma Drops Podcast, this transcript is imperfect. Because life and humans—and automated transcribers are imperfect. But it’s pretty damn close. :)
Rebecca Warfield: 00:00:00 Hey Dharma Drops listeners. It is your friendly neighborhood yoga teacher, Rebecca Warfield. And before you get going into this super fun podcast episode that I am really excited about. Do me one quick little favor and look down to your phone and where you see the option to rate review and subscribe to this podcast. Please do so. The more you rate and review and subscribe to the podcast, the more it moves up the charts. And really this podcast cannot be a success without your support. And it already is an amazing success. There is now downloads in at least 33 countries I counted yesterday. So who knows what has happened today. But in any case, if you have not done so already, please rate the podcast and take two seconds. Just leave it a little review like this lady's crazy, love her number, whatever it is you have to say. And then don't forget to subscribe and then enjoy the episode.
Intro: 00:00:52 This is Dharma Drops with your host, Rebecca Warfield. This podcast is a little bit about yoga, a little bit about life and a little bit about whatever. And just as a warning, this podcast is unscripted. So that means I might regret a few things that I say, but hey, maybe I'll say some pretty awesome stuff to remember. These are musings, not truths. Buckle up. Giddy up because here we go.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:01:23 So Dani told me that we were going to get along really well because you are the only person who says fuck as much as me.
Gaby Merediz: 00:01:31 Yes. Yeah, that is what I love. So then I was like, oh, I know. I can just say anything to her.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:01:37 Anything you want. So we are here on Dharma Drops podcast and I am your host, Rebecca Warfield, and I am here with Gaby Merediz from Make Your Perfect. And we are here to say the fuck word a lot today.
Gaby Merediz: 00:01:49 Yeah. Although you know what? We went on vacation and I think my kids have now surpassed both of us and how much they say, fuck, which is not good.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:01:56 So you are the second person on this podcast to talk about their children saying fuck, it is interesting. I don't have children, so I don't know anything about kids and like bad language.
Gaby Merediz: 00:02:04 I think I started to swear more after I had kids and when they were really little, they actually did not copy it. I don't know. It was not a weird, it was not a taboo thing to say. So they never walked around going fuck, fuck, fuck, how some kids will once they hear it. And so now, though, that they're eight and ten, they are saying it like a little too much. Like if they dropped stuff and they're like mother fucker.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:02:31 My parents would have lost their marbles. So I grew up in a pretty waspy household, like we are about as a white Anglo Saxon Protestant, as it gets. I always joke because I am Rebecca Warfield Jane, my sister is Ann Elizabeth, my brother is, John Christopher. It doesn't get any whiter than that. Where? You said you were from the middle I heard you say somewhere in the Atlantic.
Gaby Merediz: 00:02:48 Mid-Atlantic. Yeah, so I am from western Maryland, from a small town called Hagerstown.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:02:52 Like who is from Maryland?
Gaby Merediz: 00:02:54 I don't know actually there are a lot of people in Maryland. It is a small state with a lot of people. And for anyone who's in listening in my home state. I am sorry for saying this, but Hagerstown, sound fucking sucks. I graduated high school, and as soon as I could get out of there, I was gone and I have not been back match since then.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:03:10 So where did you, why did you say you start saying fuck so your parents like [inaudible 00:03:12] I don't, don't ask me. I remember the first cross word I said. The first cuss word I said was in middle school, what up Smithsburg High School! No middle school. Middle school, not high school. And I remember saying the word dammit and I felt really bad.
Gaby Merediz: 00:03:25 Really?
Rebecca Warfield: 00:03:25 Really guilty. But that is okay. That is what it was. So being a wasp or a former wasp, whatever. My mom overheard me on the phone when I was in high school. I said, Jesus Christ. And she lost her marbles yet so funny. I did not even know that was not okay to say until I moved down to south.
Gaby Merediz: 00:03:41 Where are you from?
Rebecca Warfield: 00:03:41 I am from Connecticut. And there is a lot of like Catholics there, but I did not know it was a bad thing to say. My parents did not allow me to swear, but I did not know Jesus Christ was bad until I moved down here. Like, oh my God, or anything like that. But my parents speak Spanish. I mean we, I do too, but they always were in Spanish and I did not know until I was in high school that they were actually swearing. I was like, oh, another word. Interesting. There is a lot of things in the south that I was not prepared for it. Like when I moved down here and someone was like, oh, you are a yank. And I was like, a what? And they were like, yeah, a Yankee. And I was like, like for real? Like you mean that like for real, for real? It was really interesting. So anyways, guys, we are here to say the f-word a lot, but also we are here to talk about some pretty awesome stuff today.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:04:25 So Gabby, you are the, should I say founder, the Creator, the owner of Make Your Perfect, what's the right word?
Gaby Merediz: 00:04:31 Oooo a create, creator.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:04:33 I always had trouble coming up with the, yeah, creator. I feel like we should call you like a creatrix.
Gaby Merediz: 00:04:38 I like Creatrix of Make Your Perfect.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:04:41 And so this is generally a yoga podcast. Before we get into Make Your Perfect, are you a yogi?
Gaby Merediz: 00:04:46 Well, actually not very much.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:04:50 That is cool. That is even better?
Gaby Merediz: 00:04:52 Yeah. All my life it was, it always was the thing that was like not, I was not going to burn enough calories to be like worth it. So if I was going to exercise, like I have to go out and like just fucking like run really hard.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:05:04 I ran last night for the first time in my, I call it walking. I was walking and jogging. Yeah. I call it running even though I am really just like jogging as slower than most people walk. I totally understand yoga was not enough exercise.
Gaby Merediz: 00:05:12 No, so recently more recently, like in my thirties, I started to do it more often and I have gone through phases where I totally love it for whatever reason. Like whether it is like for my body, but it is not, it is usually like write more for my mind. I am not a class. I am not the kind of person who likes to be with other people. So like taking classes was always really hard for me and I went to my first class probably like five years ago only.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:05:44 Interesting. I go back and forth with that. I started practicing regularly in classes and then for like pretty much the last year, I practiced almost solely at home. And then just a few weeks ago, it is like I really want to be with some people. Like I want to back to my yoga community, you know? So I have been practicing at a studio, you know?
Gaby Merediz: 00:06:02 Yeah. So it is interesting. I go back and forth. I think like everything in my life, I go back and forth with it. I have never been super, like super into it or super, I guess knowledgeable about it. I did in college, I think it was like the summer after my freshman or sophomore year of college, I got and was like that yoga book from the library. And as I was reading it I got really into the whole philosophy of yoga. And so I ended up really never doing yoga except for Headspace.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:06:30 That is part, that is yoga. You know what I mean? The yoga doesn't happen in asana.
Gaby Merediz: 00:06:33 Interesting.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:06:33 It is so funny that you said you got a book from the library. So for those of you who are listening, Gabby and I just met. Yeah, we just met and now we are BFF. I teach at UNC Wilmington. I teach English. I don't know if you know that about me.
Gaby Merediz: 00:06:50 I think I read that.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:06:50 There is like a lot of changes that happened with young people that feel relatively quick. So when I first started teaching English, eleven years ago, the library was like a normal place. You would go to get information. And then maybe two years ago, one of my students was like, I required them to have a library book, like a source in their research paper, just so they had the experience of like holding a book. And this kid was like, how do you check it out? And I was like, well you go get the book, and then you like check it out. And he was like, but what do you do? And I was like, wait time out. I said, how many of you have like checked a physical book out of the library and out of 25 students, just a few raise their hand because they're just in, they're digital human beings, you know what I mean? They live in this digital world and so they were all really familiar with like getting like electronic articles and electronic books and stuff like that from the library database. But almost none of them had actually been to the library.
Gaby Merediz: 00:07:49 Whereas when I went to the library I was more comfortable with like the drawers with the Dewey decimal system. Do we then right. And I was nervous when like there we had to use the database to find the journalistic sources and I was like this is too confusing. I don't understand why I am like going on a computer and where all this stuff. Why is it on the computer? Like in microfiche, remember like that was a lot of technology for me to handle back in the day.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:08:12 So I don't know if you want to disclose this. How old are you?
Gaby Merediz: 00:08:14 I am 40.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:08:14 So I will be thirty-seven this year. So we are like of the same generation. The library generation. The library generation where we had real books and real hands with little Dewey decimal cards.
Gaby Merediz: 00:08:26 Well, and the libraries were also cool like in my college, the library was like huge.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:08:31 Where did you go to school?
Gaby Merediz: 00:08:31 Vanderbilt.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:08:32 Oh my gosh. Yeah. I have been looking at one of their doctoral programs actually. We will see. That is years down the road, but maybe.
Gaby Merediz: 00:08:40 Their libraries like haunted and beautiful and you'd go study and these nooks, you know. Every library has a thing, a characteristic, anyway.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:08:48 I actually went to UNC Wilmington. I graduated from here. So I finished my last two years at UNCW and then I stayed for Grad school.
Gaby Merediz: 00:08:55 And now you teach there?
Rebecca Warfield: 00:08:58 I sure do. I was not planning on it, but 2008 happened, and the economy crashed and they were, hey, you want a job? I am like, fuck yeah. Yes. So doing it now for eleven years. It was full time for a number of years. But I am part time now because life is awesome part time cause I get to travel around and talk to cool people. So speaking of that, can you tell us a little bit about Make Your Perfect.
Gaby Merediz: 00:09:19 Yes. So what it is basically I am an artist and I inspire women to live in their full, real, authentic expression. And so Make Your Perfect started. Gosh, it is like such a long story, but so I was always an artist. I came out of college with an Art and Communication degree.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:09:42 That is a cool combo. Art and Com.
Gaby Merediz: 00:09:45 Yeah. So I mean basically I had to show my parents, I was like major in something other than art to show my parents, I was going to do something and they were like, you are going to be a journalist. And I am like, no, I am not. I do not want to be around people.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:09:56 Do you know how many of my students, who were English majors, were like, how do I convince my parents? I am the worst person you should be asking right now, because I am trying to reroute my career.
Gaby Merediz: 00:10:07 Well, it is funny because my day job is freelance writing actually. And so that is how I consistently pay the bills. So, after I came out of college, that was not what I was doing. I tried to do the art thing. I was in Connecticut where people pay good money for art. And so it was hard, like the illustration thing did not really work out. But I was doing a lot of portraiture and working oil paints and people paid lots of money for portraits up there and whatever. And then I moved down to North Carolina when I was twenty-five, I want to say. Once I moved here, I would go to these vendor shows and I would try to sell my stuff. And first of all, my stuff was always naked women and naked women choking themselves and kind of dark.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:10:57 I do not know if the south is ready.
Gaby Merediz: 00:10:59 Oh my God. Right. I was in between just pictures of the beach and more pictures of the beach.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:11:05 Mermaids.
Gaby Merediz: 00:11:06 And sea turtles.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:11:06 Live, laugh, love.
Gaby Merediz: 00:11:08 Oh my god, yes. And my things are like, fuck you over here, you know?
Rebecca Warfield: 00:11:13 So good.
Gaby Merediz: 00:11:15 And so nobody liked my darkness. And so then I threw in, I would like watercolor pictures of like fruit and tried to sell it for like 10 bucks and nobody bought that. And so I was like, well fuck, I am just not going to do this anymore. So I worked in an office, and then I had kids, and then I still worked in an office. And so coming out of having kids after I had my first son, I actually hadn't painted probably in like five years or three years or something and, or made any art. But I started to, it was that time when like blogs were becoming popular and everybody was blogging about getting crafty with your kids and all this crap that you can do with your kids. It was literally like, I forced my two year old, for me to paint their hand, and slap their hand print on something and they cried the whole time. Well, I thought it was cute at first. I was oh, that would be so cute to do with your kid. Then when I would actually try it, the kid would be fucking crying and then there is red hand prints all over your house. Or once I tried to do something with food coloring and whipped cream in the bathtub and I dyed my children blue. So I was, this is not being creative with your kid. And this is putting everybody into a bad mood and no wonder grownups grow up feeling I suck at being creative. Because your parents probably made you cry by painting your butt cheeks and turning them into a pumpkin one. So it became my passion to teach parents how to interact creatively with their kids. That is where Make Your Perfect started.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:12:40 That is really cooI, I did not realize that. And what is interesting is I just talked to a woman or I interviewed with a woman, for maybe one episode ago. Yeah. It was just this last episode. She runs a program called Mini Me Yoga. Her thing is not about teaching kids yoga. It is teaching adults and parents how to teach their kids yoga.
Gaby Merediz: 00:12:57 That is awesome.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:12:58 That is really interesting because it means that these things start from the top. Yes. You know.
Gaby Merediz: 00:13:02 Yes. Well and they start from the top, from the bottom, you know.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:13:05 From the bottom, from the top.
Gaby Merediz: 00:13:08 So right. If the parent is teaching, it really starts with when you are a child. As children, at some point we were all taught to turn off our creativity. We had it for a little while and then it was, I remember my parents always asked me “what are you doing,” when I would be making a mess. That got me to be where I did not, I really did not make art until I went to college because I was finally out of the house. And if I wanted to make paper in the bathtub, I would not have to explain what it was doing to anyone.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:13:38 That is how I felt about even my college experience because, oh, that is fine. I hit the mic all the time. So for people who are hearing that, look, we are just two people hanging out with a microphone and sometimes I hit it like that, you know. When I decided to major in literature in college and in Grad School, I have both degrees in English literature. You know, it is not necessarily like creating, but it is still a creative process. Yeah. And my dad, instead of honoring that, he said, well, what about dental hygiene? Like you missed the mark.
Gaby Merediz: 00:14:10 Because you are not being published all over the place and writing all these books. You are just doing this and that is not enough.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:14:18 So like something creative now, they never stopped me. Right. That is like one thing I will always say about my parents. They never actually stopped me from doing anything.
Gaby Merediz: 00:14:25 They said all these things.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:14:28 It is just like never, it just was not like the path. You know? It is interesting. It is. So, I mean that is like, that is the crux of it all. Is that like your, that is why most people grow up being like I am not creative because maybe they cannot, like if they want to draw that flower and they want to make it look like that flower, they cannot make it look like that flower. So they say boom, I am not creative. But creativity is what you do walking through this world. Yes. On a daily basis. It is the creative process that you use when you are planning where you are going to go to dinner that night or whatever. You know? There is different levels and yeah, and your style, for example, like that is a creative process. God, we are so great if some, if you work and I think anyone who works in anything, you know, in any, any job, like you have to be creative. I don't know. You have to be creative to live. So anyway, everybody is creative. You are all creative. I don't care if you cannot draw a straight line who can draw. Nobody can just relate.
Gaby Merediz: 00:15:27 I just wish everyone could see the way she is looking at the microphone. She's staring at the microphone.
New Speaker: 00:15:40 I am looking at all of yawl. That was my soapbox.
Gaby Merediz: 00:15:41 Everybody is creative and everybody is an artist and so that is what I wanted to show with Make Your Perfect. I started blogging about stuff and then I actually opened up a play space for kids, in this town. An indoor place basically it was just a big open room with wooden toys and kids could hang out and get creative and we had an art room and blah, blah, blah. I wanted to teach parents, yes, I get that. That kid is not actually painting with a paint brush, but the fact that they are taking all the paint brushes out one by one from the container and putting them in the other container that is there. That is creativity at their age, their stage of development. So anyway, I open this place base, blah, blah, blah. It ended up being that I realized nobody cared about the place. Nobody cared what their children did. They weren't bringing their kids into get creative. They were coming in to hang out and open up with other, other women. Like the moms were just there, going in to connect. Right. And what I heard...
New Speaker: 00:16:31 It was like a place of their kid to go do something so they did not have to deal for a little day and connect with each other.
Gaby Merediz: 00:16:36 Exactly. And I was always there connecting with them. And so what I heard from people a lot, and I have always been, no, not always. I, after I had kids, I finally, I actually was not this outspoken before I had kids. Before I had kids, I did not really talk much. I was really shy.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:16:50 I find that very hard to believe.
Gaby Merediz: 00:16:52 It is so fucking good, and my name is Gabby. So when I was little new teachers would be, oh, Gabby, you must talk a lot. And I'd be, nope. I am like, stop saying that, that embarrasses me. After I had kids, I think I just like lost. I did not have time to think anything anymore, so I just became who I was. That was what it was when I was there at this place space. The moms would say to me stuff, thank you so much for saying this. Thank you so much for sharing whatever you just shared. So fucking openly. And it was usually, it was if something about hating my children. There, there, I love you guys.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:17:31 We have to just say that. They're out there somewhere.
Gaby Merediz: 00:17:33 So we don't know where. We are locked in my bedroom and my kids have the run of the house right now, and so they were like, thank you for saying that, because I always thought I was the only one who felt that way. But now that you said that you felt that way too, I don't feel so crazy. And so kind of everything has stemmed from that. So after that, I closed Tea Muffin. Deciding that I want to work with the moms. Fuck the children. Can you say that that on a podcast?
Rebecca Warfield: 00:18:03 That was hard. No, well you are apologizing and I just envisioned t-shirts - Fuck the Children. It is about us, we are taking it back. Do you know how many moms would probably secretly have a little sticker somewhere, in a drawer. Fuck the Children. It is underneath the baby on-board sticker on their car.
Gaby Merediz: 00:18:17 That person, does not cover it up with the baby on board sticker.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:18:22 That is hilarious. Oh, I am going to start making those just with it on the back.
Gaby Merediz: 00:18:27 So it was, I want to work with moms and Make Your Perfect was actually the tagline of TMuffin, which was the play space. And the whole idea was for your kids, for your mother, had make it your version of perfect. So that is what that meant. I have always been terrible at naming stuff. It means a lot to me. And so people are like, Whoa, how do you even say that? That is what it was about. I did some coaching for a while. I wanted to help continue that, helping women now in the stage of motherhood, being trapped in motherhood. All these women saying they were trapped in motherhood and me, I wanted to show them, you are not trapped. This is all you need to do to get out of this. Right? So I did coaching for awhile and through that time I was not really making art, but I think I was still being creative with my own kids. I was helping other people be creative with my own kids. The creativity never went away. I just was not painting a painting again, that idea of, I gave myself guilt. I was well, if I am an artist, and I am not making paintings, am I really an artist? Which is what grown ups do. And so that is a thread that goes along with everything that I have taught and everything, is accessing your own creativity in whatever way that you know, whatever that means for you. When you do that, that is when you start to access this expression of yourself when this and the expression of yourself, not just, oh, being expressive through art, but being able to go hang out with a group of women and have a great conversation because it was stuff that was hitting me at that time too.
Gaby Merediz: 00:20:05 I had kids, whenever you would go, you do meet up groups and it was fun, having kids was a great way to meet a ton of moms and women. But you would go, on these moms night out and it was like, I am sorry you guys, anybody who ever went on a mom's night out with you. But come on, they're boring sometimes, everybody talks about their kids and you were rolling your eyes. Like fuck, I just want to have a real conversation. But all these women, and I think in my experience, it happened through childhood or motherhood and having children. But I think it happens to all women. Like you are in the workforce, so you lose yourself. You have kids. So you lose yourself.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:20:48 Ohh there is a dog barking.
Gaby Merediz: 00:20:48 That is my dog.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:20:48 What's your dog's name?
Gaby Merediz: 00:20:48 Chance.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:20:49 Yeah, that is right. Chance is rooting through my bag, which reminds me of my dog beanie who passed away last year. But she used to dig through my bags and steal my snacks, because I would put snacks in my bags, for work. And then she would find them.
Gaby Merediz: 00:21:04 My dog is probably going for the crotch of your swimsuit. Is that a swimsuit?
Rebecca Warfield: 00:21:08 Oh yeah, there is a swimsuit in there. Dogs.
Gaby Merediz: 00:21:13 I mean he is a pussy dog. I mean it is not surprising.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:21:18 I mean dogs, and I was just thinking too, I don't have children and so I have never done the mom's night out sort of thing. But even just being around groups of moms and anyone I know who's a mom don't hate me because I don't mean this, but I have heard the competitive birth story, a million times. I was in labor for sixteen hours. Oh that is nothing. My child. And I am like oh my God.
Gaby Merediz: 00:21:41 But that is your only frame of reference at that point. That your only thing which is super important, right?
Rebecca Warfield: 00:21:50 Which is not making you like feel good about yourself is that you like powered through labor.
Gaby Merediz: 00:21:51 It is really important to women and mothers and femininity at a lot of levels, but there is more beyond that.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:21:57 You have lost it all. So that is all you can dredge up to talk about is that, or your children.
Gaby Merediz: 00:22:03 And I think it happens when you go out with coworkers. If you are in the working world and you are not a mom or whatever, you go out with coworkers. It is hard. Everybody's got some version of their, for the birth story.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:22:12 Every time I took out the yoga teachers, they all end up talking about yoga, which is fun. I like yoga Dharma Drops podcast is really designed to remind everyone that there is more to life than yoga. Well, you know, yeah.
Gaby Merediz: 00:22:26 That is what Make Your Perfect became ultimately. So thanks for bringing it back, even without knowing.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:22:32 I am just here to help guide conversation. That is all.
Gaby Merediz: 00:22:38 So that is like, it all came back to that, for me personally, was, you know, I was super and I was a workaholic. I love helping other women.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:22:49 I cannot stop working.
Gaby Merediz: 00:22:51 I opened a business; closed the business; started coaching; stop coaching; and now, I got back into my art so that the story culminates and I finally get back into my art. I finally realized, what I like to do, is not teach women or coach women or I did not want to hold their hands as they went through the journey. I wanted them to know the journey was possible and I wanted to inspire them going into the journey. That is what women told me that I did that I by me talking so openly about everything. I inspired them to go through some journey or go into a new, dig for another part is interesting.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:23:31 For me like that is how the yoga practices, I mean it is different, it is two different subjects. I believe that a good yoga teacher doesn't take you down the path. They open the path.
Gaby Merediz: 00:23:40 I mean right. It is so interesting. But as a yoga teacher, isn't it so hard to take yourself away? Your ego become so involved and you take it so personally if someone is maybe not learning or are not going down the path the way you have envisioned them to be going down their path or whatever and yeah, you take that so personally. And that was really hard for me as a coach.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:24:00 For me it is actually not too hard, but I also have so much experience working with young people, which will teach you experience.
Gaby Merediz: 00:24:09 You are working with young people?
Rebecca Warfield: 00:24:10 Yeah, because I worked with NCW for so long, you know? And so I am very accustomed to being, well yes, that is the path, but you just fell, you have stalled out down that path, you know? So I don't find it super hard to not take it personally, but it is a conversation I hear a lot. It is interesting in the yoga world.
Gaby Merediz: 00:24:32 And probably what makes you a really good yoga teacher?
Rebecca Warfield: 00:24:38 I try not to. I cannot really think of any examples of when I have, but I do know that, that is something that happens and being able to let people go. Yeah. If maybe they have hit a wall in the path with you, okay now it is time for you to move to someone else. Or you are not listening to me and now you are just doing it on your own.
Gaby Merediz: 00:24:57 You are so funny to me, because what is going through my head right now. I am, that is how I feel about my children. That is another thing, you take it personally, if your kids aren't growing up the way you want them to be raised. And I wish I could be, oh you are not listening to me, you can just go. I kind of say that sometimes, but yeah, I wish you could be you can go try it with someone else now.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:25:16 You can go find somewhere else to live for the next 20 years.
Gaby Merediz: 00:25:20 It is not working out with me. Obviously.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:25:23 This relationship with you, between you and me, it is not working. It is really you, not right.
Gaby Merediz: 00:25:29 That is what I want to tell them all the time. That is the stuff that nobody talks about though. That is the stuff that women don't talk about. They don't talk about, I actually do feel like that. I actually do want to go sell them to someone else for five years because I don't know what I am doing and it doesn't feel good and there is like, you know. I think in voicing that, it is just so huge for women to talk for women to talk period. Whether your mom's talking about that, whether you are talking about yoga, whether you are talking about, whatever. I think it is so important to put it out there because the more you talk about what you are really going through for real, without sugarcoating everything, then other people are, you know what? I feel that way too. And now we are really connecting.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:26:12 A friend of mine, I haven't seen her in years. She moved to Charlotte a long time ago, but I remember when she was pregnant and everyone was, oh my god, it is going to be the best time of your life. And she posted on Facebook. She was, I really appreciate all the positivity, but I am going to be really honest. I am scared shitless. I don't feel well. I am not looking forward to this right now. She is not, in this I don't want to have this baby sort of way, but just, this is the reality. And then, all the comments were, oh my god, I felt the same way. I am so glad you said that. I remember feeling that way. I was too afraid to share it. I just remember watching from the outside, that was a really powerful thing for her to say, out loud, for herself and for other women and other moms.
Gaby Merediz: 00:26:55 Yes. And so it just takes you to access that part of yourself like one time and express it in public one time and look at how much that opens doors. My line from a few years ago, the message coming to me from the universe for awhile, was my mantra, honesty opens portals because I was realizing that being, expressing yourself without just hiding it all, was really making just magical things happen in the world.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:27:29 I cannot stop thinking about a friend of mine right now who it is a little bit different, because it is not motherhood stuff but it is just the same thing. She's thirty and she was just diagnosed with breast cancer, which is crazy. And she made the decision to be very public about it on social media and document it. She was, look, everything is always about women over forty having breast cancer and let's eat yogurt and put a little pink bow on it and call it something pretty, you know? And she's been really open about it. And I think for her it is something similar because she told me, we went for coffee recently, and she was, I understand this as a gift now. I mean not that it is a gift, right. No one wants to have breast cancer. But the lesson to be learned. And she was, because now I have something to tell the world. Now I have this thing that can like really support other women because she's not the only woman under, thirty years old diagnosed with breast cancer.
Gaby Merediz: 00:28:21 Wow. And that gives me goosebumps because it sucks.`That you have to go, or the people who do go through hardship to be able to come out with this message. But sometimes, and I don't know, a thought that came into my mind was, are those people chosen because they're able to deliver that message? I don't know. I don't know if I believe that people are chosen or whatever. Yeah, you can deliver that message. So do it. And here's the thing, we all, every woman out there has a message to deliver it. And I will say, in my life, I really haven't had hardships so my message isn't coming out of, oh my gosh I had a horrible childhood, Earl or a horrible even experience as a woman. I really haven't had a horrible experience as a woman. I have not been sexually assaulted the way. Yeah I have been sexually bothered. I think all women are a bit, as part of when the Me Too thing came out, I was like I don't know if I should even say anything because I don't even know if these things like constitute a Me Too thing, or is it? So there is two threads of where this is going. But my point was that, I think so many women are afraid to share their message because either it is too much, because they've been through so much hardship or whatever or it is not enough because they haven't really been through any really intense hardships. So they are, well, is my message valid? Yes. And whatever you have to say, I am looking at the microphone again.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:29:45 Seriously. She's like glaring at it in a passionate way,
Gaby Merediz: 00:29:50 Whatever you have to say, whatever you have to say is worth saying is the whole point of the matter. The fact that, how like I haven't really been through any like huge struggle my life. I have had a blessedly, devine, amazing life, but as a woman in this world, and I think because my life has been so green, I have had so many, I am so grateful for all the opportunities I have had and whatever. But almost because of that, I can see how I have also, come through this society as a woman in society. And I have seen the way women are treated. And I have been groomed to grow up as a woman in society and I could. Like I said, I was not really vocal about anything or expressive or whatever until I had kids and did not have time. Until then, I was in the I lived a great life, but I was not myself. I was in the mold that my parents had taught me to be, that society had taught me to be, part of the reason why I was not really outspoken before that is because, I had always been taught that as a lady you have to have good manners. Saying fuck or sharing something dark about yourself or your dark thought or not.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:31:08 My mom listens to this podcast sometimes. She's probably going to kill me, but she always used to say to me, god you are so crass. Yeah. I know you are crabs and I am crass and that is why we are here tied.
Gaby Merediz: 00:31:22 Yeah, that is right.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:31:23 Okay. So you do some pretty interesting artwork though with women. So can you share, I asked Gabby to explain to me what she wants to talk about. And she said that she, I forget how you articulate it. Wait, you can say it better than I did. I forget you had like a really beautiful way of, I teach women how to, was it, meditate on their pussies? What did you say?
Gaby Merediz: 00:31:45 Did I say in their pussies? I do not know, I was brain dead. Remember I had just gotten back from vacation and so she wants me to tell her two sentences. I do not know what I said. My artwork is, what I want women to do, what I see women are doing, and what I think is that opening that allows you to be yourself, and express yourself fully, and be outspoken and be as crass as you want to be. You know what I mean? Is to have this connection with your pussy. I guess one of the things I often say is if you want to be yourself, if you want to be, break out of this mold. And you then feel there are these things that are still choking you, still kind of keeping you down, in some weird, oh I just. Well maybe it is when I get together with other women I never know exactly what to say or that feeling that I had just never know exactly how to quite be myself. The answer is look at your pussy,
Rebecca Warfield: 00:32:41 Okay. So can you explain why? This is because, this is like when you sent me your text message with what you want to talk about, I was, I don't even know how I am going to guide conversation because I have never had this conversation before.
Gaby Merediz: 00:32:54 Yeah. I love having this conversation for the first time.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:32:57 I also cannot stop laughing cause so many people have told me like, oh I was listening to your podcast and the school pickup line. I was like, Oh shit. For the volume down. So I am just wondering how many people right now are like, oh shoot.
Gaby Merediz: 00:33:09 Well I would say, I use the word pussy and vagina around my kids and they don't get in trouble at school for saying it. They know what it is.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:33:19 The vagina is definitely, that is the word. Yeah.
Gaby Merediz: 00:33:23 But I even use the word pussy and one of my sons started saying titties recently and I had explained to him like, it is not kitty's, it is like your boob. But they use that word and I don't think it is a bad word, but that is a whole other aside.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:33:41 That is a whole other podcast.
Gaby Merediz: 00:33:43 Yeah, another podcast. So yeah. So the whole, like the whole thing about pussy is basically this, if there is a part of your body that you are downright ignoring, then how are you going to feel complete? Everything and all that especially. This is why I think, where we connect, in terms of like the yogi side of you, right. Is that your pussy is like, it is also your womb center. It is a second shakra, right? So even if you do not, and even if you are a man, you still have energy in that shakra. You have energy in that space and that is your life force energy. It is your creative energy. It is your intuition.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:34:27 There are men listening to this podcast. More than I thought actually, who probably this time are going to be like, what the fuck is happening?
Gaby Merediz: 00:34:34 Look at your, I call it your energetic pussy, you guys. That iswhat it is. Look at your energetic pussy.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:34:40 My boyfriend listens to this podcast and he's going to be like, I am not looking at my energetic pussy.
Gaby Merediz: 00:34:43 Well then I will draw it for you and you'll have... But see, there are a lot of women listening to this podcast and they're probably saying, I am not going to look at my pussy either, you crazy girl.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:34:55 And so do you mean straight up, I am going to take my eyeballs and look? Or is this more of like the internal gaze?
Gaby Merediz: 00:35:00 All of it.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:35:01 All of it?
Gaby Merediz: 00:35:01 All of it. So hear is thing, you cannot have the internal gaze, if you don't have the external gaze. I mean you can work on... Because, what happened to me, is basically, I started getting into a spirituality practice and learning more about different spiritualities and kind of following the path that felt good for me. And at the same time that I was doing that, I came across, I think I was in an entrepreneur group, with a girl who was a sex coach, and she has now taken off, I have followed her the whole time. So I was learning from her. I started to do practices with a jade, like a Yoni egg that you put up inside your vagina. That is a little bit of internal work. It is a little externally, you have to actually like put something in there, but it is a little internal. And it is like, you realize you can do all this work or you can think you are very sexually open or whatever, but then someone asks you to like take a mirror, look at your pussy. And it is like, nope. And so there is a cutoff there. And there is like a meme recently that I saw, and probably shared, but it is if you want to be a powerful woman but you cannot look at your pussy, there is a little problem there.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:36:10 Right. And going back to what you were saying too, most Dharma Drops, listeners probably know a little bit about the chakras, but to come back to the earlier conversation. This is the space of creativity. The second chakras is space and creativity, it is the water space. Even if we are just talking about living a creative lifestyle, this is the space of the body.
Gaby Merediz: 00:36:32 Girl, you just brought it together and that is where that came from.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:36:33 I am just here to guide conversation.
Gaby Merediz: 00:36:36 Yeah, that is exactly right. And so if you feel and a lot of women, coming out of motherhood or I think coming into your mid thirties, at some point you are, all right, I did the career thing, I got the house, I have done the milestones and now I want to get back to myself. I want it. A lot of times it has to do with finding your hobbies or wanting to get spiritual, a lot of women's start a spiritual path at that age. A lot of women want to get creative in some way.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:37:00 It is really interesting, because the last few days, since I was planning to come over here and record this podcast and stuff, I have not felt super creative lately. I have just been really busy building, a business and a brand and stuff like that. And I was thinking, I used to do much more creative stuff and in fact this morning, I was like, what did I use to do that was creative and it was not anything. I am not an artist, I cannot draw shit.
Gaby Merediz: 00:37:21 You are an artist, but you may not be able to draw shit, but you are an artist.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:37:25 I make really amazing little greeting cards. And I used to do things knitting and I do dance, which has always been my creative outlet. Even dance sometimes can end up feeling much like work, a dream rehearsal season and stuff when we are preparing for performances, can feel a little like, fuck . Alright, I have got to go.
Gaby Merediz: 00:37:40 That makes sense, because what we are taught in this society is to follow a masculine path; to follow the masculine energy; that the masculine energy is the one that has value. So the masculine energy is direct lines, like linear action action, that build on itself.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:38:01 Which I think is important and not wrong.
Gaby Merediz: 00:38:02 Nope. Not wrong.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:38:03 I think what's important to remind listeners is sometimes when I think when we talk about things like following a masculine path, dudes are, well what's wrong with that? Nothing.
Gaby Merediz: 00:38:13 Right, there is nothing wrong with it. Except... So what happens is that it is so highly valued, that the feminine energy is just literally choked, blocked, suppressed, not allowed to come up. And you need a balance. So if you are a hope, if you want to embrace your whole self as a human, you need to look at your pussy, then you need to embrace your feminine. andf natural energy.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:38:36 Have you read the book, Lean In, by, cannot think of her name right now.
Gaby Merediz: 00:38:39 Yeah, I know the book but I haven't read it.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:38:42 I read it for professional development book circle, a long time ago because that book came out a while ago, but even someone, I cannot think of her name. This happens to me every time I record a podcast and I promise you everyone listening, it is like, what the fuck it is?! Yeah, I cannot think of it right now. She talks about this too, not to use your femininity as manipulation, but if you are a woman in power, you are a woman, in power.
Gaby Merediz: 00:39:08 So you may not have to do things the same way that the man in power does, and that is okay. Yes. You can still have again, still be powerful.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:39:18 Yes. So I had an old therapist and she always told me, and she did not mean this in the literal way, but she always used to say, you know, Becky, the power of the pussy is quiet. And she did not mean you don't have to speak. She was really talking about this lunar path. That it is creative and it is dark and it is internal.
Gaby Merediz: 00:39:39 Yes. It is subtle and you cannot see it.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:39:43 Subtle, is a good word. Subtle. Yeah.
Gaby Merediz: 00:39:43 That is the thing, we live in a world where, straight lines and action equal productivity, equals success, but only if it is visible and only if you are doing. Whereas the feminine energy is the energy of reflecting, the energy of feeling. And so what a lot of us do, it is the energy of creating, it is also a circular energy. So I want to say this for any women listening or men listening, whoever feels like, god, I just don't get anything done because I am always coming back to the same thing. Or always learning the same lesson. That is your feminine energy and we are taught that. That is not okay, but that is okay. That is how feminine energy works. Like the moon, like nature.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:40:29 Yeah. I would say, cycular, which is a hybrid between cyclical and circular and I [inaudible 40:33] making shit up over here. I am thinking about a theorist that I read and I used in my graduate thesis, which was about the Bigger Bitch of the West. Yeah. And I actually talked, Sometimes I am always really freaked out by how my life comes back to the same lesson. Because it was about Western dichotomies and how when they're merged together, it creates this sense of like wickedness. And so very long story short, I argued in my master's thesis that the wicked witch of the West, in the book Wicked, she combined masculine, feminine, a human and animal and mind body to create this hybrid. And we don't understand the hybrid. And that is why she was wicked. But in that, that is a long story for me to explain.
Gaby Merediz: 00:41:25 I want to read it. I have goosebumps again.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:41:25 It is weird as shit. So coming back to it, there is a theorist name, Arigger Rye that I used in my thesis, and she talks a lot about how writing in the feminine is, cyclical and that we cannot, there is this linear, and she doesn't necessarily mean literal. We cannot start from point A and go to point B, but it is the whole thought process,. It doesn't have to be this really structured thing. That it is cyclical and we can move around, it can curve, it can, it can take shape and create something new and come back. And that is her whole theory, which is pretty cool.
Gaby Merediz: 00:42:03 And that is cool, what you said, create something new. So in that, in that circle, in that formation that you are doing to go all around from point A and eventually, maybe, get to point B or back to point A. It is this idea that you are creating something along the whole way. And even if you cannot see, so that is where there is this link to spirituality as well. Even if you cannot see what you are creating, it doesn't mean that you are not creating something, you are always creating something by living in the world with your energy. And if you feel stagnant or bored with your life or whatever it is, probably because you are not accessing all of your full energies. And I think for both men and women it is usually that you are living in a very masculine energy, dominant in a masculine energy dominant way. And you need to allow more of a balance between accepting and celebrating the feminine energy because we don't celebrate the feminine energy. We are like, oh god, we are going through a circle again. And we are shame on you for doing this, instead of just going for what you want or when you are experiencing emotion, when you are like really depressed or sad or any emotion really, we like chastise ourselves. Why cannot you just like let this roll off your back and get over it? And so if you are doing that you are not truly living. I do believe that we chose, our souls or whatever you call it, chose to be in human bodies for a reason and a human body has all these abilities, right? We have like physical sensations, internal sensations and this combination of it all, like the mind, body connection, bringing it all together and we are using that for a reason. So if we are choking and off some reason, if we are blocking off our feelings then we are not truly living in this vessel, that we chose to come live in.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:43:48 Yeah, I think it is complicated to live. I cannot speak for the male experience, but I think that western, to bring it full circle again, I think it is complicated too because we are in a very sexually driven culture, but it is also very shamed. There is sex everywhere. I am watching the TV show, Ballers right now. It is an HBO show with the Rock because I love the Rock. It is a good show and there is like a ton of sexuality in it, which is fine. It doesn't bother me, but then you go out into the world and it is like, cannot do that. So there is this confusion about how to live. And I do wonder sometimes though, for women of a younger generation, if they still feel that?
Gaby Merediz: 00:44:31 It is interesting. I have a who I just met through this coaching group who is thirty and she keeps telling me, because, what I do with my art is, I actually paint portraits of women's vaginas, to help them look at it. So that is the first step, sometimes. If you cannot look at your vagina in a mirror, well maybe you can send me the picture. And then when you put that picture up on your wall and it is more abstract, and people are always, that is beautiful.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:44:56 I have seen your work online. It is really beautiful. Right.
Gaby Merediz: 00:44:56 Thank you. Then you can say, that, my pussy is beautiful and I look at it every day and now you are starting to be able to create that connection. But anyway, so I always thought that it was women who had were our age and had gone through this stuff, their milestones in life.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:45:15 Or older.
Gaby Merediz: 00:45:15 And this girl keeps, she's like, no girl; she's like, millennials; she's like my friends. Where are your target market? Because we are not afraid of that shit. It is like we are not afraid of our pussies. And so that is really interesting to see. Because that is the thing I think that women, our age are, often afraid of our, we were talking,.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:45:33 I cannot believe I am at an age where we say, women our age. Oh, I forgot I have water. Gabby brought me a glass of water and forgot it was mine. But she walked in and started drinking my water. She was like do you want some water? I was like, sure, and she came in, she took a sip, and she was, I just drank your water.
Gaby Merediz: 00:45:52 This was yours, but I got her another one. I am a good hostess.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:45:55 You are a good hostess. So anyways, back to millennials.
Gaby Merediz: 00:45:59 So yeah. So yeah, so there is that. So I think women our age are often afraid of, our pussies and our generation. Our generation is a little more open than our mother's generation. But our mother's generation went through an interesting thing with like the feminist movement starting and all of that.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:46:14 It means the summer of love.
Gaby Merediz: 00:46:17 So this is where it is very interesting. I think it'd be so interesting to like be a fly on the wall in that time. Like go back to the 1960s and see really how it was. Because now, what I am seeing now with modern women our age or older, between their forties and 50s, that is when they say, women come into their sexual peak and all of this. And so I do have friends who are like, damn, they were not wrong! I am having al this sex and my relationship with my husband, or they've gotten divorced and now they're like having great sex with their new partners or partner. And so it is still tied to sex and it is still tied, like their sexuality is still tied to sex and it is still tied to this idea of horniness. And so when it comes up in an environment where it is not, quote unquote appropriate, it is still shut down. And I think for millennials it is a little bit different. And what I am trying to get, what I have realized in my own spiritual journey is that they are one in the same. And so if you shut down your sexuality when you are not having sex, then you are missing out. It is kind of like saying that it is a part of your sensory system. It is saying, I am going to shut down my sense of smell when I am not having sex. And what would you miss going out in the world? So it is like paying attention to your sexuality as another sensory experience that is not only, just tied to like sex, physical pleasure, like touching the skin of your genitals and that turns you on. But how that then relates to like your inner workings. So talking about going inside to the chakras or the energy, and you start to notice. Like it is, it is hard to explain until you have been through it. But what's really cool is that when I tell, when I talk to women who had been through it, they're like, yes, and why did not someone tell me? And it is like, well, I can tell you all I want, but you are still going to be, well Gabby, I am not going to go home and masturbate because I got way too much shit to do today.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:48:23 When you sexualize something appropriately, not in this weird way that Hollywood's done, stuff. It actually becomes less sexualized and not in a bad way. So when I was in Europe a few years ago, everyone's topless on the beach. And I was, oh no, I do not want to go topless on the beach. And I was fuck this. When in Rome do it and no one cared. The dude came by to buy beer, did not give a shit that I was topless. You just want us to make some money with some beer. And so when I think when you own your sexuality, it becomes less of an issue. It is an issue at the beach when we are all covered up here, South Beach North Carolina, trying to make sure nothing shows suddenly becomes an issue. Does that make sense? I am having a hard time articulating myself.
Gaby Merediz: 00:49:22 But that is the thing when it comes to talking about sex sometimes it is because there is so much surrounding it that it is hard to talk about it without going off on a million tangents or articulating yourself properly. Because we've been taught not to articulate, thoughts about sex. So of course it is hard to articulate, but I totally know what you mean. When you allow sex to permeate and open up and just be open about it, then it becomes part of your everyday experience and it is just not a thing. It is not ,oh, I am getting myself off all day. So I am horny all day. It is a literal being turned on by life. And not just turned on in a, oh, I am light-filled and feel happy. But it kind of is then genital experience, but then, it is not sexual. It is so weird. It is like your sexuality becomes a very, an awakening. It is an awakening yet. And it is at first, it is like the ultimate, it is the ultimate connection to the energy of the universe, your own workings.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:50:22 Well, the second chakra is space of potential, right. We think about it in terms of like having babies. Though it is potential. If that space is alive and it is been reawakened, it is the potential of your life. Yes. It is the potential of your career. It is the potential of your creativity. It is the potential of anything. And it is like the seed, and you are watering it. Yeah. And we are taught not to water it. That is the thing we are taught not to look at it. We are taught not, I mean, just like the close, your legs thing.
Gaby Merediz: 00:50:48 Like both of are sitting with our legs wide open, you guys.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:50:52 But yes, like people telling you to close your legs or I mean all of it. Like, yeah, don't talk about sex in public, but god forbid, you don't put out for your husband after you have been married to him for 10 years. Then he might leave you. So you better like be really open in bed because, but don't talk about it. Just don't talk about it. Two places at one time.
Gaby Merediz: 00:51:16 Right. You just cannot be in two places at one time as what we've been taught. But I believe that we should talk about it more and we can live and all of these places because this is the human experience. It is hard though. So that is where I recognize that it is hard. There is a lot of trauma. Your cells of your vagina hold emotional trauma that is connected with your brain. So it is like they hold memories that, can be negative. Literally not just, it is like literally they like, you know how they're starting to find studies that show that your gastrointestinal cells are the second brain.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:51:56 I was just having this whole dialogue in my head while you were talking. I was like, I feel like I need to mention the second brain.
Gaby Merediz: 00:52:00 Yes. No, that is what they're finding out that the cells in your womb space are similar too. They also, I read something recently that said there is something in your heart that is also like that like the cells themselves can think.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:52:09 I am not a doctor, I am not a medical professional, but you just cannot tell me that the cells of our body don't carry our experiences. Yeah. You just cannot tell me. I don't know how it works. I have no proof that it does, I am just here to say I agree.
Gaby Merediz: 00:52:24 I agree. It does meet too.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:52:26 I am not going to publish any studies about it. It is just fucking true.
Gaby Merediz: 00:52:30 Me too. Well I did read some studies on it. That is the thing with freelance writing and all of that. Like I do a lot of writing where I have to read study. So I have read a lot of these studies and I often don't remember them or whatever, but every time I read them I am like, oh right, that makes so much sense. And so that is really interesting. So it is, there is a lot of work to be done and it can be really and it is scary. And so a lot of times we shut ourselves off from our pussies and from our sexuality in general, unless we are like just doing it for sex and just doing it for someone else. But to do it for ourselves, to look at it for ourselves, it is hard sometimes to look at it with someone else. It is hard. Like sex is hard because we've been taught, we, we've just kept it so repressed for so long.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:53:09 And so it is that periods in life.
Gaby Merediz: 00:53:11 Yes, I mean, society has done it to us and so, my aim is to kind of, peel back the layers and just start opening ourselves up so that we can all, truthfully, because I get fucking bored, hanging out with people who are so repressed that they cannot express themselves. And I am, oh god, I shouldn't have hung out with you today. If only you looked at your pussy, then you might be cooler. Come back to me when you do.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:53:38 I think, you know, when you said you get bored, one of the things I love, this is a little bit off topic, but one of the things I love so much about performing is it is an opportunity to speak. It is an opportunity to be creative and then tell someone. And now granted it is modern dance and half the people are like, what the fuck was that?
Gaby Merediz: 00:53:55 But something went through and then even if they cannot verbalize.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:53:58 Every time Aaron comes to one of my performances, he was like, what was that one about?
Gaby Merediz: 00:54:02 My husband too, whenever he watches, So You Think You Can Dance, he's like, I just don't get it. I just don't get it.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:54:07 The first time Aaron came to one of my dance performances was for Danc for Loris, which is a really cool thing here. It is a combination of film and dance. Yeah, it is super cool. And I was in this really wacky piece and we all had these different huge latexts, animal heads on and we did all this crazy dance with them. And then at the end I had to strip my friend Kate down into her nude undergraduates and feed her newspaper while yelling headlines in a megaphone. I was like, this guy, I had just met Aaron. I was like, he's never going to talk to me again. I was like, I wonder if he's even still in the audience right now. And we are still together and he still comes to my stuff and he's still like, what was that one about?
Gaby Merediz: 00:54:42 That is amazing. That is nice that he asks and wants to know.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:54:43 Yeah, I know. Well and look, you cannot, most people like family members of dancers are like what the fuck was that? But in any case, it is still an opportunity to say these things. And to express them through the body, that is why I love performing so much.
Gaby Merediz: 00:55:00 And I think that you can get that through a performance in creative dance. I think you can get that through yoga. Just the activity of doing yoga connects things and it is like the reason.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:55:10 That is what mantra does in yoga. If you use mantra and you are working it into the body, it is like becoming this whole embodied experience.
Gaby Merediz: 00:55:19 And it doesn't matter what your brain says. So this is where I think a lot of people get hung up. They get hung up on like, well I cannot explain what that meant or I saw that dance performance and I cannot explain with words, what it meant. It doesn't matter, they experienced it. And it is the experience. Words are limiting. The experience is wide open. Like the experience is, there is full potential there.
Rebecca Warfield: I know, I am like all excited, but I am just thinking about like my old roommate, Alison, she used to come to my performances too and a lot of them should be like, I did not like that one. That one got on my nerves. I was like, good. It worked. She was like, you are supposed to get on my nerves. I was like, no, but like the whole point is to feel something. Yeah, that is it. It is just to evoke some sort of response. If you are like, that was fucking stupid, I am annoyed about it. It is doing its job. Yes, exactly. And now the rest of the work is hers to do. It did its job. Exactly. And maybe not, like maybe the job, I believe that like our purpose in life is simply to have the fullest experience of this life that we can have.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:56:27 Yes, I am always, anytime I publish stuff about Dharma Drops, I am always talking about experiencing, enjoying the fullness of life, the whole part of it.
Gaby Merediz: 00:56:36 And not trying to analyze necessarily why that is, but just to really experience it. And so, I love hanging out with women like you, who get that and talking about it, we are opening things up. There is pockets of women opening this up. I see it happening all over the world and all these groups that I am in on Facebook and just like different friends groups around, there is like, yeah, people are starting to talk and we are opening things up and we are connecting on this new framework. That did not exist when I was 20. I feel like, no, none at all. And so I feel like with my art too, that is my goal, man. Is like, when that is the thing, when I am making my art, I am, and that is something I did not realize until I started to go through a spiritual journey. I was like a total atheist until I was thirty. But I thought like a metaphysical stuff was interesting. I thought like quantum physics was interesting. I thought like, woo, woo stuff was cool. I did not know very much about it.
Rebecca Warfield: 00:57:41 It is always interesting to me, in the philosophical route it is sort of like to say that something isn't as equal to saying as it is. Do you know what I mean? If I am so steadfast, nope, this is not real. That is the same level of belief of yes, think something is real. You have to like issue like all of the things that, yeah. And so it is interesting because I was like that. I was like, I don't believe in anything. I don't even believe in science. Like even science is just like manifested and created from our own perspective. So how can that be real so therefore, nothing is real. But that shit, I mean that started to change as I started to experience like this connection with more different energies. And I don't even remember where, why I brought this up or where I was going with...
Gaby Merediz: 00:58:28 The spritual practice and like the full experience. Um, shit,
Rebecca Warfield: 00:58:35 I do this all the time. Every time we record this podcast, I am like, I don't know what I am talking about. Luckily we can edit. So the last eight minutes and a half that we were like, what were we talking about? You miss all that part. Okay, so go ahead.
Gaby Merediz: 00:58:54 So yeah, when I make art, the best art that I make and there is a lot of times I am just doing technical stuff, but when I am in the zone and I like, I am sure you are like this with dance, even with your yoga, you are not worrying about the technical. I would still, when I am really in the zone, I am literally sometimes I teach, I am tracing something that I see on the paper and I am like, I am not doing this. I see it happen. Like it happened when I did that painting on the leftover there it was appearing me and I was like, oh my god, I'll have to do trace it. I realized that, so opening, it is like you can open up all these little like knobs on your body and when you have opened up like the spirituality one, the physical sensation one, and there is all different physical sensations - taste, sight, touch, smell, all of those. But opening those up, opening up the like connections, the flow through meditation or through yoga and then opening up your sexual part, your sexual body, all of that allows for... I think we are just like transmitters, like antennas and that keeps opening you up to then express it, in whatever way is for you.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:00:06 In yoga we call them grantees. And which I love that they sound like little monsters, like in your body, grantees. I am pretty sure that is the word. I feel like if I am wrong, I'll post it in the show notes. I am pretty sure it is grantees and they're like these knots. That is what they're called. And as you unlock them through the aausina practice, it lets the energy flow. And it brings you back to your fullest self, whatever that is, whatever that. The yogi says, well, believes it. That is why we do all this work to get rid of the knots.
Gaby Merediz: 01:00:33 All right, so think about this now. So if you are doing all of that, but you are like, have a chastity belt around your pussy, like are all the grantees, like really like able to let that energy flow. Put some grantees in your pussy and then tell me how you feel about your yoga practice in a month. Or don't take away the grantees in your pussy. Put them in there. You want to take them away.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:00:56 Yeah. That is the whole idea and that is what I see happening to women.
Gaby Merediz: 01:01:02 So many women are, they're up leveling. I think collectively as a society, we are upleveling. I think we are doing that by accessing feminine energy more often. We are in a world where we are recognizing that we need a balance of whatever we need. Balance of all of it. Let's not keep anything down. And so as that happens, I lost my train of thought again. It is circular, it is going to come back. See that is the whole thing that I used to get so embarrassed when I was like on a podcast or whatever and I would have this circular tangents, ways of thought or when I was teaching or coaching people. And I am like, no, this is actually our way. Like this is how we are supposed to process. So I am not even apologizing, for having circular thoughts anymore.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:01:55 Remember listeners, you can always fast forward 15 seconds.
Gaby Merediz: 01:02:01 Yeah, a little tap, tap there. We are all trying to uplevel, we are all doing all these things. Like some of us are going back to school or finding new loves or taking up yoga practices. I know a lot of women our age who are just starting to do this more spirituality practices or whatever. But if you are, and I’m friends with a lot of you, so, I hear you. No, I hear you talk and I know, we hear this, like the complaint, it is like we are going over the same lessons again or yes, I am seeking and I feel like I am getting somewhere, but there is still something that is blocked. Like a lot of times it is like, that my relationship is still shitty. I don't know how to be honest in my relationship or I don't feel connected to other women.
Gaby Merediz: 01:02:40 Like as much as I want to connect, I am ready to connect. I am ready to receive. Why am I not receiving? Why am I not exactly where I want to be? And so my answer is like, what if, what if you had just tried to pay attention to your pussy a little bit. Just a little, just do it and tell me. And a lot of times it seems frivolous. It seems like that idea of, like it is so crazy. Why would I even bother to do that when I can go to my yoga class and then go to my evening college course I am taking and then come home and be really good with my kids and blah, blah, blah. If I am doing that all day. Why do I need to look at my pussy?
Gaby Merediz: 01:03:19 And it is like, because when you are walking through the world with like a black hole and part of your body that you, you are literally like redirecting energy around it and being like la, la, la, la. I am not even paying attention to you and just, I was going to say, think of what can happen if you, if that is no longer a black hole, but it is like we cannot even think of what can happen until you try it and see and look back.
Gaby Merediz: 01:03:41 And that is what happened to me. Like opening that up and now looking back it is like, oh my gosh, it all comes together. My life feels so much more fulfilled. And not only that, but now I feel like I have access to like sensory experiences that I never knew were possible. Like being able to see something on a paper and then draw it. Or being able to feel like literally feel or hear energy that you never were able to feel in here before. And sometimes I do, sometimes I feel crazy. I am like just going crazy, now that I am turning 40. I don't think that is it. I see it happening to women all over. I think women are accessing their full selves more and that makes you more just like receptive to everything in your world.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:04:30 I wonder too, like I know this is about women, but I had never liked to exclude anyone from conversation. And like you said, like we all have this space in the body. So I am just curious to know, because I am not a guy, I have no idea if they feel like they're missing the creative part of life as much as women or more, I think my gut would say more. Yes. You know, but then I don't know, I think about like Aaron for example, he's so creative just in different ways. Like he's real rebuilding our kitchen cabinets. And that is like a whole creative process for him. That is like something I don't understand or do, but it is for him and he really enjoys it. Yep. And I asked him, he was painting the kitchen yesterday. I said, do you like painting? He was like, oh, it is okay. It is rewarding. Like he feels good when it is done. I was like, we are two different people, because the last fucking thing I want to do is paint anything.
Gaby Merediz: 01:05:21 So, I think that we, and you know we all lately, especially in the news, I mean everywhere publicly we've been talking about how women have had it so hard. Women have been just oppressed, in said in so many ways and just kind of like, patted on the head and stifled and whatever. But honestly I think that men have just as much, because men have all of this, they have emotion, they have feminine energy too. And that is stifled in them just as much as it is stifled in women. If not more, if not more. And it is even more fucked up for them to express it perhaps because it is been, so taboo for like men to express feminine energy for a long time. So I mean if it is hard for women to express their feminine energy, it is like what about the men who have that as well? And so yeah, I cannot even really speak to the male experience because I am so far removed from like what it is like to be a man. Except I have a husband, and I actually, I am surrounded by men in my house. I grew up by the women, but like my animals are male, my kids are male and my husband male. But I do also think that we experienced men, like men and women just experience the world differently.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:06:36 I totally agree. Emotion wise, I think even like what we call emotions might be something totally different for men. And I don't know.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:06:45 On a really simple level, like physically we experience the temperature of the world differently. Like I read this study that women often feel colder. It is not because we are, in fact sometimes our bodies run a little hotter, but our skin register's temperature. differently than men. So there is always this like big debate about like the office temperature and stuff like that. And it is because like we really do experience the world differently. You feel it differently and you feel it differently.
Gaby Merediz: 01:07:10 Yes, I believe it because I feel like that, and I did not even realize it extended to like your outward self. And it is interesting because before I had kids I was like, you know, men and women aren't different, it is society that makes them different. And they're not inherently different. And if you think so, like you are sexist. And when I have children, I am going to raise them like gender neutrally so that they can just like, I don't want them to grow up with these norms. And then my boys, like, I just don't know how it happens. All they wanted to do was play with trucks and I am like, play with the My Little Pony, look it. It is colorful. It is a horse, it is a horse play with the My Little Pony. Cause I am bordering on tours. And they did not want to, they and.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:07:55 Aaron talks about this all the time. He was like, little boys just want to hit shit. When, his brother and his partner were expecting, they knew their having a girl, but they are, we are going to raise a gender neutral child. That little girl, girliest girl. Oh, my god, that was so funny. They like, they did all these things to be gender neutral. They like, it just happens. They just come out how they're going to come out. I am like, I wonder if God, like if the societal influence is just so ingrained that it just…
Rebecca Warfield: that is the big question, nature versus nurture. And you know, it is a little, I mean, it is still gotta be a little of both. I mean, like when you point out stuff like that, like we, our cells receive things differently, whether we are male or female or in between. Like, and that is the other thing though.So as humans, are we all just experiencing things differently, right. You know those things. What was it like the Blue Dress and.
Gaby Merediz: 01:08:54 Oh my God, I just, what was I just watching? Oh, I was watching like an art video and she was explaining why that happened. But it is so weird to realize that like people see the world differently. Yeah. Like there is half the population saw that totally differently. Yeah. You know, and so what else are we seeing differently? Is that not even just physically, emotionally, spiritually? I mean we are all seeing the world differently. That doesn't make one version right or wrong.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:09:19 No, and that just makes it different. That is where it is even more important to use, like your fullest sense of expression. Like to tap into your creativity. You are going to come around full circle too…
Gaby Merediz: 01:09:33 Feminine energy is like ripe right now. I am so we are just like going in all kind of, what did you call them before? Cycular?
Rebecca Warfield: I don't know. I made up my own word. So, yes, that, see and then I lost my train of thought, because you were like all applauding me. And then I am like, oh...
Rebecca Warfield: 01:09:52 I am coming back to our creativity.
Gaby Merediz: 01:09:54 Oh yeah. So coming back to our creativity is so important because of that idea that words are limiting so much of our experience and we are trying to like really express ourselves. Like words can only go so far, if you are seeing, looking out the window, what you see, like you are seeing that tree is green and I am saying that tree is green, but what if we are both seeing it differently? Then green doesn't cover it. So we just need to access more ways to cover that. For ourselves, not even to be able to communicate or anything, but I think just to fully experience and before we experienced stuff just in our mind. Then we are only really experiencing it with words and then our emotions are limited. Everything we are experiencing is limited. So cracking that open and being able to access it by getting into flow states, which is really what like creativity is. Without needing to explain it. Like to me that is the key, to the perfect life.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:10:50 I keep thinking about an old coworker of mine who told me when he was in college, he did not know he had bad vision. He just like saw the world. It was blurry. You saw the world and then he went to the doctor and he's like, you need eye doctor and like you need glasses. And he said he put his glasses on, he couldn't believe all the lines and the leaves of the tree. And I think it is a similar concept. If you take away one sense, you are missing the experience. He did not see the fullness of the tree.
Gaby Merediz: 01:11:19 Right. If you are not paying attention to your sexuality, if not paying attention to the pussy or your creativity, you are not experiencing the fullness of this life. And you never, you don't know it until you get it and then take it away almost. Just think that is what life is.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:11:36 It goes back to those stupid visual things again. There is another thing that popped up on Facebook for awhile that everyone was talking about. I don't remember what it was, but if you looked at it one way, you saw one thing and then if you could see it another way you saw a cowboy. And it was one of those things. It took me forever to see the cowboy, but once I did, I could not unsee it.
Gaby Merediz: The brain flips back and forth.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:11:55 I could flip back and forth. Aaron and I were actually just talking about this. So then you could flip back and forth, but until you saw it, until you knew, you just had no idea. You don't know until you know.
Gaby Merediz: 01:12:08 You are just like, no, that is a picture of a witch or like whatever else. Yeah. I mean that is the thing. That is the crux of it all. And so that is why working in this business is really hard because it is really hard to explain to people that they need a portrait of their pussy painted.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:12:22 Is this like something you say like at the school pickup line, like, hey, have you thought about getting your pussy painted?
Gaby Merediz: 01:12:29 Truthfully, I feel like I would be the kind of person.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:12:34 I feel like you would. May I paint your pussy today?
Gaby Merediz: 01:12:37 I know what you need. You looked desheviled and stressed out.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:12:40 Let me paint that pussy.
New Speaker: 01:12:40 You don't need the shower. In fact, so my kid got in trouble for saying hooker at school recently and I actually emailed the principal and I told him, I was like, listen, I think I said something like, I work with vaginas. And if my son, and my son is mortified by the word. And if he knew that he was saying to somebody like a girl, something that had to do with a vagina, he would not have said it. So yes, I bring up my...
Rebecca Warfield: 01:13:08 The principal is probably, what the fuck?
Gaby Merediz: 01:13:10 I know, right? Yeah. I bring up vaginas a lot. But I think, I think we should, I think it normalized it. Like it normalizes our thinking about our own vaginas if we talk about it.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:13:18 And just also the language, right? I cannot tell you how many times I have heard women say things like, [inaudible 01:13:23] word. It is not a who-ha right. It is not, I don't even know all the other weird words.
Gaby Merediz: 01:13:30 Did you ever read the Fifty Shades of Gray book?
Rebecca Warfield: 01:13:33 No. I opened to one page one time and I was like horrified and I was like, I cannot read this.
Gaby Merediz: 01:13:39 So in those books, which were supposed to be like the most what? Like the most sexual mainstream books to come out for like this pain regiment or watch the movies, like that is what they were touted as. Right. So the woman who wrote them, no offense author, whose name we don't know. I know she just called it “down there.” So she would be like, just trying to be like, it was supposed to be so raunchy and whatever and she couldn't say anything more than 'down there'.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:14:08 See we were still skipping. Yes. That’s the whole crux of it. It is supposed to be super sexual but ignore your vagina or your vagina.
Gaby Merediz: Yes. But put his throbbing cock everywhere. I think that should be our next sticker too. Put you are throbbing cock everywhere. So yeah, I think we, I think we need to normalize it that way so we can feel it. Like we talked about feeling things with our fingers and that is what I say to my children. My children do get mortified because there are vaginas everywhere.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:14:42 I don't see that many.
Gaby Merediz: 01:14:47 I have a pair of shorts out there that I was painting vaginas on today and my son said, he was like, this doesn't look like vaginas. And I was like, why? And he said, so he said they did not look like vaginas. And I was like, why? And he was like, I don't know. I was like, is it because they're not hairy? And he's like, yeah, and they're all different colors and I am like, they are all different colors. I was like, yes, I did take out the hair for these pictures. But I was like, that is a great way to like then explain to your kids like, so now my kids know vaginas are all different colors. So when they start watching porn they're going to be like, that is wrong because my mon said...
Rebecca Warfield: 01:15:21 I am pretty sure they are purple.
Gaby Merediz: 01:15:21 Actually my kid was today, he said they're not purple. He was like, I am pretty sure they're not purple. And I was like, actually sometimes they kind of are purpleish I am letting them know what's up. And I think we all need to do that. I think talking about it more, let's people know that this is part of your body. This is part of, that is okay to feel and what's like, what happens when you start feeling?
Rebecca Warfield: 01:15:46 So if listeners want to get their vaginas painted, how did they get a hold of you?
Gaby Merediz: 01:15:52 So my website is www.makeyourperfect.com and I am pretty active on Instagram under the same @MakeYourPerfect.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:16:02 Awesome. So you can get a hold of Gabby that way. Is there anything that you want to share before we wrap up into the next little segment of what I always like to do on podcasts? A big takeaway.
Gaby Merediz: 01:16:14 Just if you think that it is not important enough or sounds so crazy. I know you think like paying attention to your pussy might sound so crazy. I invite you to just consider, just considered looking at it. See what happens. Just see what happens. You may be appalled, but you are feeling something new.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:16:39 You know it is crazier than looking at your vagina, pushing a baby out of one. So if you have a baby, I think it is hard to at or look at a woman pushing a baby out of her vagina. That is harder than looking at your own. I think.
Gaby Merediz: 01:16:55 Maybe not. I think it is crazier to look at your vagina I will say.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:16:55 I don't know much about birth and babies.
Gaby Merediz: 01:16:56 But, yeah, look at it. Just look at it. Because I think if you cannot look at that, what else are you not looking at about yourself? So what else are you not being honest about? And I know, and like again, going back to like if you, it is crazy if you think like, no, I have all this other stuff to do, just consider it. And that is what I like to share on my Instagram. So if you follow me on Instagram, I like to share other because I am like no longer, I am in the coaching world, so now I share what I am learning from other coaches or like, you know, just what inspires me from other coaches. And once you start getting into that, it is kind of addicting. You are like, ooh, this sounds so interesting, let me learn more. And then again, like once you see it, you cannot unsee it. So just see it, just see it once, take my word for it, and see what happened.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:17:42 That is cool. What about for like the five guys that listened to Dharma Drops Podcast? I can think of a few right now who are probably like, oh my god, I cannot.
Gaby Merediz: 01:17:53 I know. I don't know. I feel like I have trouble talking to my husband. He doesn't really get what I do. And sometimes he's like, are you just, are you sure you are not gay? I think sometimes he's like worried about that. I feel like I am so far removed from the man's experience, but, so my thought is like, honestly, I would give you guys really big props if you started to pay attention to your wound space, to your sacral chakra. And see what, see if something shifts for you. And if it does tell me. I do see myself down the road getting more into the male experience of it, but right now, I just have to take things one by one. But I did recently, so one of the things I do actual vagina portraits where people snap photos and send them to me. But I also do energetic vagina portraits where I sit and it is kind of like doing an aura reading. And so I just get energy from you. And then in that idea, that idea of like when I am in a trance like state and painting, I kind of see it up here and then I just follow it. That is kind of what happens when I am sitting with you and I paint your energetic vagina. Right? And so, and it is funny, so I am friends with this guy who's a shaman and you know, so you think he's like really open and whatever and he totally is. But even he's making jokes about that like, ha, ha, I do not know if guys want their energetic vaginas painted Gabby, you know? And then one day I drew, I did his, I was sitting with him at a vendor show and it was like without him knowing, I was just like kind of reading him. And I did a portrait and I gave it to him and he was like, oh my god. And so I don't know like what it brought up for him. But I was like, this is like your womb space center. This is your energetic vagina. And it is funny because someone said it looked like a peacock. And I am like, of course the one I paint from it has a little cock in it. I don't know. I don't know. Did that shift something for him? He definitely gives me less, what's the word like gives me less hassle about like dry or like makes fun of it less or whatever. In from the man's realm, like the man's point of view.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:20:02 It is important for guys to remember too that tapping into like what we call the womb space, again, it is potential. I cannot speak man language, I am sorry, as I am not a man. But let's just think about like that traditional route. If you see potential and career, that is the womb. If you see opportunity. It is the womb. And so like being a witness to the potential of your own life is tapping into that feminine. And feminine, oh, we should have said this in the very beginning, at least in eastern philosophy, feminine doesn't mean woman.
Gaby Merediz: 01:20:35 It doesn't mean women. It is just the different energies. It is just, it is like yin and yang. Call it whatever you want. Call it X Chromosome, call it Y. I don't care. And honestly if you do not... Like back in the day, when I was 20, I wouldn't have believed in that either. I would have been like, they are just lumping things into two categories, but everything is just really so different. How can you lump it together? So even if you don't believe that there are two separate categories, the goal is like just feel everything, or just allow yourself to feel everything. That he's not like, oh my god, I have got to feel everything in every moment. But notice what you are blocking in your life and note. And you know, if you put it in the dichotomy of the feminine and masculine energy, it often is, we often block the feminine energy because we've been taught, it is not valuable to express or use or whatever. But, I hear my kids the background.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:21:27 That is the first. I have had cats in the background, dogs in the background and now we have kids in the background.
Gaby Merediz: we found my children just at the end of the podcast, perfect timing. So it is just that, like consider instead of judging your, and I am like, what are they talking about? They're probably like, what are they talking about? I know, I am sure. They're like, oh no, they already know. we talk about vaginas Yeah, so consider that, that instead of shaming any sensations or emotions that you feel, allow yourself to process them and allow yourself to process. And that is where like yoga comes in. Like allow yourself to process. And not, and we always have been like processing comes in from journaling or thinking about it or venting about it, talking about it with a friend. But that is just what happens in your head. Let yourself process it like through the whole realm of your body. And that is where, so my tagline is, it has changed so much throughout the years, with the three words that I always use in my tagline are, creativity, pleasure and flow. Cool. And so it is anything that elicits creativity, use it; anything that elicits pleasure, use it. Like a lot of, when you think about your experience of the world, especially if you think about your physical touch sensation, think about start noticing how often you are blocking pleasure. And a lot of times it is because of an association with the taboo-ness of sex and pleasure, but pleasure doesn't just have to be sexual pleasure either. It is just like ultimate, to me pleasure is like ultimate. Like allowing of experience and then flow. Like anything that gets you into a flow state helps you acts as it automatically helps you access your creativity, your intuition, like your womb center. And so everything that you do, whether you are a man or a woman, if you can do it with creativity, pleasure and flow, then you are telling me you are doing awesome. Yeah, you are tapping into all of your energy.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:23:19 And I think that is like a good takeaway at the end of this. And itoday is July 1st but this will go live July 5th so first of all, happy 4th of July to everyone. And in the spirit of independence, what freedom is that, to have like to, to enjoy your life, to be creative and be in the flow state? That is like, I know fouth of July is like a totally different thing, but if we are talking about wordplay, with independence, that is like a real freedom in life.
Gaby Merediz: 01:23:46 Totally. Because really we often think that the things that are holding us back are like money or as some external factor, lack of opportunity, poor relationship, whatever. But really, and I know we hear this in so many ways, but like we are really holding ourselves back and I believe that we are holding ourselves back by, by not opening our, what did you call them then? Gruntees. Yeah. Grantees, right. We are holding ourselves back just by like choking off our bodies. In some way, all the time. And, and this is the way that I think a lot of us, we explore a lot of different ways to open ourselves up. And this is kind of an untapped way that a lot of people haven't explored. So I want them to know like the freedom of exploring this like is totally transformational.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:24:33 So I always like to end things on the podcast with some conversation about nothing has to do with anything. So are there anything, is there anything happening right now that we should check out? Like any good books and a good TV shows and good movies. I know you just came back from vacation, anywhere we should travel to.
Gaby Merediz: 01:24:52 Oh my God, what should we talk about? I did, I just went to, so I go to vacation in somewhere in the North Carolina mountains every year and oh nice. Oh my god. And so, you know, my favorite thing to do there is to go to swimming holes.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:25:04 I have never been actually, to a swimming hole.
Gaby Merediz: 01:25:08 I'll tell you this. So there is one in Pisca for us. It is outside of Jonas Ridge, North Carolina. And I cannot believe I am telling you this secret because it is like amazing. So it is part of the Upper Creek falls, but it is the lower cascades there. We went there and I had read some blogs beforehand and so I just had an idea. I was like, let us, we have inner tubes, like big nice ones. So I was like, let's bring those. But I think it is, I was like, I did not know how big, how bad the hike would be. So I deflated and pack them in the backpack. Put the pump in there, take the hike all the way down. We are the only people there and there is this waterfall that is like goes in this curve, this beautiful flat rock into this. Just clearpool at the bottom. And you could go down at like, you are at a water park, but it is natural.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:25:55 That is so cool. I love the North Carolina Mountains. It is so beautiful. We just went, well, it is actually been a month ago. We were in south Florida, then The Bahamas, but we went to Harry Potter World. I am not a Harry Potter person. I don't, I don't dislike Harry Potter. I am just not like a crazy, Harry Potter fan.
Gaby Merediz: 01:26:15 I know nothing about it.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:26:15 I have read some of the books. I have only watch one movie, but I'll tell you what, it doesn't matter if you are into Harry Potter or not. It is pretty amazing Harry Potter World. It is like impressive. And butter beer is delicious.
Gaby Merediz: 01:26:23 It looks so cool. I heard you can find the recipe online and then like make it.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:26:31 Don't tell me that. I cannot have it.
Gaby Merediz: 01:26:34 Is it really bad for you? I do not even know what is in it.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:26:36 Oh it is probably like 20 cups of sugar or something. It is delicious. It is really good. So that was really fun. But not beautiful. Like the North Carolina Mountains.
Gaby Merediz: 01:26:45 Well you know what's interesting is like when you go to a place like that, waterfall place, you know the first thing I want to say is like, oh it is like Disney World. And you are like, no, actually Disney World tries to make things as magical as nature. You know what I mean?
Rebecca Warfield: 01:26:57 We looked at going to Disney just because we were going to be in Florida, but I YouTube it and I feel like if you don't have little kids it wouldn't be cool. I mean, I guess, I don't know. I haven't been since I was young. It just looked really little. So that is why we choose Universal.
Gaby Merediz: 01:27:10 I think Universal seems cooler.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:27:12 I wrote my first roller coaster at Universal last month.
Gaby Merediz: 01:27:15 Shut up, why did not you ride a roller coaster your whole life? Are you scared?
Rebecca Warfield: 01:27:17 I was scared.
Gaby Merediz: 01:27:19 What made you get over your fear?
Rebecca Warfield: 01:27:20 Well, Aaron's not going to let me leave with, I was just, I was not going to be able to exit that park, without getting in the fucking roller coaster. It was like do it. Actually, he wouldn't make me do anything I don't want to do, but I definitely get a little resistant, but I know myself well enough that if I did not do it, I was in a really regret it when I left. So my, my first rollercoaster was The Hulk, which apparently people call a rite of passage. Which I don't even remember because I had my eyes closed the whole time. Was it scary? Yes, I remember going up the tracks and like laughing and I was like, oh. And then I remember one sliver of blue sky that I saw when I like barely cracked my eyes open and I was like, fuck this and I was done. I was like, I don't want to do this.
Gaby Merediz: 01:28:01 I think it is scarier to do it with your eyes closed.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:28:04 Aaron was having the time of his life. I was not having the time of my life. I don't know if I do it again. I mean I did. I don't know. It is just like I did not feel amazing afterwards. So I think the older I get, because I used to be terrified of roller coasters until my uncle gave me 25 cents to go on one at Disney world. And I was like, yeah, give me one for 25 cents. And I was like, yeah. And I did it and then I loved them. But as I got older, they hurt your body. I feel like when you are little, you are like I don't care if I am being knocked about. And as I got older I am like, oh my god, I don't know. I wish you guys could've seen her like jerking herself around. But we also did the ride at the, the Griffin Door Building, which made Aaron very sick. It poor. Aaron was like motion sick. He got motion sick in Harry Potter. He got motion sick on the ferry ride to The Bahamas. It was crazy.
Gaby Merediz: 01:28:53 Did you know he gets motion sickness?
Rebecca Warfield: 01:28:54 Yeah. But I think it was just like a little worse than normal. It was crazy. But I loved the Harry Potter ride.
Gaby Merediz: 01:29:00 So what kind of ride is that?
Rebecca Warfield: 01:29:00 It is a roller coaster, but it is also 3D and so I don't even know how to explain it. Sometimes there is 3D and then out of nowhere this big, like animatronic dragon is comers out of nowhere. But like breaths real fire. And then the next thing you know you are like back playing quidditch on this 3D thing. But like the way they have it set up is so like when you are flying on your broom and you go straight down, the ride turns and goes like straight down. I had the time of my life.
Gaby Merediz: 01:29:41 So you love that?
Rebecca Warfield: 01:29:41 That was really fun.
Gaby Merediz: 01:29:42 Maybe you should open your eyes next time you go on The Hulk.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:29:44 Maybe. But the Harry Potter one was really fun. I think there is something about being outside that scared me. Like there is the sky.
Gaby Merediz: 01:29:52 But if you could see where you could fall too. That might be like nerve wracking.
Rebecca Warfield: Yeah, but the brain is interesting because there is this part in that Harry Potter Ride, where it looks like you are about to crash into a bridge, but it is like on the screen it speak and everyone screamed like jerked now, like I am about to hit my head and there is like nothing to hit your head on as in me. It is interesting, but that is like a whole thing of like does it really matter what you are like if you are, if what you are experiencing is real or not. It doesn't matter cause you are having the same, I know the same reaction to him.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:30:27 Okay. So any good books or TV shows?
Gaby Merediz: 01:30:31 I am trying to think. We watch my husband and I watch a shit load of TV because when seven o'clock hits, so we put our kids to bed at like 6:30. So we have time afterwards and then I just am braindead and zone out. A good one that I liked recently was Maniac. Did you see that?
Rebecca Warfield: 01:30:48 No.
Gaby Merediz: 01:30:48 It is like what has got like Jonas, what's his name? I don't know. Jonas something, I don't know. He used to be like heavy set. Jonah Hill!
Rebecca Warfield: 01:30:55 Yes. He is really talented.
Gaby Merediz: 01:31:00 Yeah. And so I am hoping he's actually in it, but I think like I watched that awhile.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:31:05 Did you watch his movie? I think it was the first one he wrote and directed I forget what it’s called. I think it’s call the Nineties, Mid-Nineties, something like that. And it was about being young in the 90s it is very good. It get a little avant guarde, too. I mean, not totally, but there is like a lot of stillness and like a lot of questions that you have in it. It is creative.
Gaby Merediz: 01:31:26 I am going to look that up. I totally want to see that. Because I really liked him. So Maniac was cool. It was all like a little bit Sci-Fi. They were like trapped in a, oh no, it was they were supposedly undergoing psychological laboratory tests but it was like all crazy. So yeah. And it is, I think it is on Netflix or something. One of those streaming. And then I recently read a good book called the Intimacy Interviews. Did you read them? So the girl was actually from Wyoming or she came to school in Wilmington too. And I think she's about like your age, maybe somewhere between our ages. So I was like, oh, maybe you would know her? Do you know? Yeah, Ashley Skeen.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:32:06 Nah, I don't think I know her.
Gaby Merediz: 01:32:07 And so she wrote this book where she went across the country and interviewed different people to ask them about their love, any love story they wanted to share with her. And it is that whole idea of just share, just open up and yeah. So she talked, I mean there were a lot of stories that went wrong, left stories that went right just so much. And I found myself like crying through the whole book, because every bit of it and I mean I have only had like three longterm relationships probably in my life. I could like resonate with every bit of it. And it was like, that is a really good book to read if you.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:32:43 That is what's really cool about literature is that connects the human experience. You get to witness someone else's life, but there are always these parts where like, oh yeah, I know what that feels like. I think a good writer is able to make that connection.
Gaby Merediz: 01:32:57 Exactly. And it is that same thing like even before you even, yeah. Before you hear like, I don't know why I know what that feels like, but it is just like your heart opens and it like connects via your emoji before it even reaches your brain.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:33:08 It is cool. I like that. Okay, so anything else you want to share before we part ways?
Gaby Merediz: 01:33:15 I don't think so.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:33:16 Okay. Well thank you so much for being on Dharma Drops episode.
Gaby Merediz: 01:33:20 I am so glad you had me. It is like a great way to meet you.
Rebecca Warfield: 01:33:23 I know I keep meeting all these cool people through the podcast. It is awesome. It is like a cool gift for me, you know, and hopefully if everyone else too. So guys, I say it every single time, but I always mean it. Please don't forget to rate, review and subscribe to Dharma drops on whatever app you are listening to this podcast on. And you can follow me @Rebecca WarfieldWarfieldYoga on Instagram and @DharmaDrops. And don't forget you can go to www.makeyourperfect.com and @MakeYourPerfect on Instagram and follow Gabby and until we meet again, bye
Rebecca Warfield: 01:33:56 Musings, not truths. People don't forget. Everything I say on this podcast is amusing. I cannot really tell you if it is the truth, but I'll let you decide if it is the truth for you. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Dharma Drops podcast. As I mentioned in the beginning of the episode, don't forget to rate, review and subscribe. Oh, shoot. You know what? Maybe even said that at the end of the episode. I cannot remember. It doesn't matter. I'd really appreciate it if you'd rate, review and subscribe. And I cannot thank you enough for always listening to this podcast, and tuning in week after week to listen to all the crazy shit that we talk about on this podcast. In any case, have a great one. And so we meet again next time. Guys. Byeeeee!
Rebecca Warfield lives in a small town on the southern coast of North Carolina. In addition to being an avid traveler and writer, she is a university English instructor and RYT-500 yoga teacher. Rebecca spent her 20s traveling solo around the globe, studying literature, and dancing. In her 30s, a New Year’s resolution brought her to yoga, and she hasn’t looked back. She currently teaches yoga full time and is dedicated to sharing yoga’s teachings with others. Rebecca is the founded Rebecca Warfield Yoga and Dharma Drops to celebrate the diversity of practices and experiences of yogis and non-yogis alike.